••• Adios Cody Ransom!!! •••

Praise Jesus, Buddha, Allah, Vishnu, Mo, or whoever you pray to at night! The worthless waste-of-roster-space stupidly disguised as a baseball player known as CODY RANSOM is officially gone!

Oh what a glorious night! I want to shout it from the roof-tops and dance in the rain! HALELLUJAH HALELLUJAH, CODY RANSOM IS GONE!

Mo has answered my prayers, the Baseball Gods have listened to our cries, and they have cleansed us of whatever sins we committed to deserve the punishment of Cody Ransom.


My Twitter followers know that I've been a major hater when it came to Cody Ransom. He was my scapegoat for everything that went wrong:
If the Yankees lose, blame it on Cody.
If the Yankees blow a lead, blame it on Cody.
If North Korea invades South Korea, blame it Cody.

It's an accepted law of physics. Just like every reaction is caused by an equal and opposite action, every screw-up is caused by Cody Ransom.

Don't try to argue my logic - it's the truth.

Proof that my logic is the truth: Epistemology students now have a way of making sure that their reached conclusions are absolute truths; if their conclusion = CODY RANSOM FAILS, then it is an absolute truth.

I'm like a caged bird that's just been set free. I'm like a little kid on Christmas Day. Cody Ransom is gone, and the only thing that can complete my happiness is winning our 27th World Series. In fact, now that Cody Ransom is gone, we probably *will* win it.

I don't know how coherent this blog post is, but you know what? I DON'T CARE! I'm just so happy.

Now that Cody Ransom is gone, I'm going to need a new scapegoat. No one has filled the big Shoe Of Failure that Cody has left behind, yet. But worry not, my fellow Yankees, a new scapegoat will present himself on a silver platter ready for execution soon. Until then, let's rejoice!

Oh happy day!
(oh happy day)
OH - happy DAY!
(oh happy day)
When Jesus washed
(when he washed)
WHEN - Jesus washed
(when he waaaaaashed)
CODY RANSOM AWAY!!

That's the BeeBz Effect. Can you feel it?